Baby Contemplations

We are nearing one year since Desmond came to us and marked our lives so wonderfully, so profoundly. I am grateful every day for the studied decision we made to have our child(ren). In many ways, it makes me feel more a part of human history, creation, God's family -- to create and connect and love your baby and realize that you are just continuing the miracle. I think it is one of Gods greatest gifts and I love Him for it!

I've borne this lovely child who has marked me through and through. I love him more that I thought possible -- my boundaries stretched. Other stretch marks, the ones on my lower stomach, hips and thighs, never did turn to silvery lines. They stayed violet and jagged, but I don't care. They are real. I was broken open. I should have some sign to remember, some minor strip that shows the inner shift, my techtonics, I was solid, before my baby. Now I'm subject to earthquakes.

--Louis Erdrich, novelist

I keep thinking about all the moments we have with DPJ and how the context will alter over the years; this past year it was shifting nearly weekly, certainly monthly. Last night, as I bent down with paper towel and windex in hand to clean away the casualties of his dinner, I thought that I might miss this particular part of our eating regimine but became overwhelmed with the wealth of our experience to come.